Notes by: Adam Harper
Date: 7th July 2024
Writer(s): Christopher Storer
Pages: 37
Genre: Drama, Comedy
Score Card
| Plot | Characters | Tone | Writing | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Score | 5.0 | 4.5 | 5.0 | 4.5 |
Overall Score: 4.5
Plot Analysis
The opening pages of the script for “The Bear” effectively introduces us to the protagonist, Carmy, and his chaotic world. After a mysterious, metaphorical dream vision, we’re thrust into the storytelling’s rapid pace and the episode’s main inciting incident, centred around a delivery mishap.
Obviously, the show is based on a much bigger incident which you will soon find out if you watch the show or read the script and so much happens that I’m not going to cover specifics of the episode.
The immediate immersion in Carmy’s stressful environment is reminiscent of Adam Sandler’s relentless experience in “Uncut Gems,” where the audience is kept on edge with no respite. This technique of constant tension and fast-paced narrative is a hallmark of great storytelling, although it might be a tad intense to binge over longer periods – as tempting as it may be.
Interestingly, despite a small intro, and the incident with the delivery, there isn’t a significant plot shift at the midpoint – I would mark it as the disagreement between Richie and Carmy over how to serve the beef and bread. This sets up their ongoing power struggle and differing approaches to their work/craft. As the episode progresses, we gain more insight into Carmy’s mental health struggles, his use of drugs, and his experiences at EMP, adding layers to his character.
A crucial moment occurs on page 26/27, where Carmy’s simmering frustration finally erupts, leaving viewers to wonder how he will navigate the unfolding challenges in the kitchen.
The ending is particularly satisfying, tossing a tin of tomatoes in the bin portrays a sense of rebellion and breaking away from expectations, a moment that feels liberating and resonates strongly with the audience. It is also symbolic too. A roller-coaster of an episode!
Character Analysis
Carmy is portrayed as a complex and relatable character, with his stress levels making him particularly human. The script gives us enough of his personality to understand his depth and anticipate further exploration in future episodes.
Camry is flawed, but he is also trying his best. If that isn’t relatable, I don’t know what is.
The episode quickly and effectively establishes multiple characters and hints at deeper backstories, particularly regarding Michael’s fate and Carmy’s reason(s) for being there. The relationship between Richie and Carmy is notably strained, indicating unresolved issues beyond the management of ‘The Original Beef of Chicagoland’.
The supporting characters are well-delineated, each contributing to the unique atmosphere of the show. Their dialogue feels genuine and contributes to the frantic energy of the scenes. Despite some characters receiving less screen time (such as Marcus and Sydney – who’s calmness with entering this frantic environment sets her up to be an important character in future situations) their distinct personalities come through, suggesting a well-thought-out ensemble that avoids clichés and stereotypes.
Richie in particular is clearly going to be an important and entertaining character with is unhinged nature creating friction with a chef of Carmy’s ability.
The term ‘Bear’ used by Carmy and Sugar creates intrigue, inviting the audience to explore its significance in future episodes.
There is also clearly a sadness that trickles through the story. Despite this, the characters are funny, and a lot of the humour stems from the banter and conversations that take place.
The dialogue’s authenticity and rapid back-and-forth exchanges enhance the sense of realism and immersion in the high-pressure environment of a professional kitchen.
Tone Analysis
The script’s tone is kinetic, mirroring the chaos of Carmy’s life. It’s filled with energy, seamlessly moving through locations and scenes that reflect the protagonist’s turmoil.
The humour in the writing, such as the description of Carmy lugging garbage bags “like a deranged Santa Claus,” adds a light touch to the otherwise intense narrative. As an aside, there’s actually a typo on this version of the script as the word ‘shoulder’ is misspelled but the writing is so gripping you can forgive a small mistake like this.
Despite minor typos, the compelling writing maintains the audience’s engagement. The world of “The Bear” is appealing, despite its stress-inducing nature. Carmy’s skills and demeanour lend him a James Bond-like coolness, making the culinary world fascinating to viewers.
Comparisons to other foodie productions, like “Boiling Point,” highlight the show’s ability to recreate the high-pressure environment of the hospitality sector, albeit with a faster pace that will appeal to the modern, hyper-fast, high-definition world.
Despite how stressful it all feels, I find the characters are really cool and speak really well. The mixture of setting, character and situation make this show so addictive. On paper, as a general pitch, I don’t feel the premise is that inspiring or original yet, the execution elevates this story well above the average streaming fodder. this should inspire you and make you think deeper about exactly what makes your screenplay leap off the page.
We’re talking about tone here – the greats have their own stamp on things – I think the wordiness could be compared to Aaron Sorkin perhaps but then the style and approach sits alone. consider your own writing voice, and the world your story is set in – is it appealing?
Writing Analysis
At 37 pages, the script is lengthy for a 30-minute episode. However, the frantic pace and concise writing justify this length. For aspiring writers, it’s important to adhere to the general rule of one page per minute of screen time to avoid overwriting. The script is inspiring but I’d recommend you don’t use this script as an excuse to not edit your work – producers will still want a writer who can write within confinements.
The script makes effective use of capitalization and bold text to emphasize important and symbolic features, enhancing the reader’s engagement. The absence of a scene heading in the opening scene is notable; while some feedback might flag this, it effectively immerses the audience in the narrative and reflects the non-descript location’s atmosphere.
The action blocks are short and snappy, contributing to the script’s brisk pace. This brevity is a hallmark of good screenwriting, ensuring that every word serves a purpose. The sensible use of dual dialogue reflects the realistic, machine-gun-like communication in a professional kitchen.
As mentioned already, there is a lot of dialogue. The episode is very wordy but it succeeds at this.
Summary / Feedback
Whether intentional or organic, the script for “The Bear” masterfully integrates subplots, metaphors, setting, and character dynamics. This cohesive storytelling leaves little room for superfluous elements, a goal every script should strive for. I’ve tried really hard to not use food puns but the script really does have all the fat trimmed off it. The script sizzles!
The script’s intensity might slow down a reader’s usual pace, reflecting its ability to maintain high engagement. It’s a beautiful work that translates well to the screen, appealing to modern audiences with shorter attention spans.
Writers should be cautious about lifting elements from this script, recognizing that its length and density serve a specific narrative purpose. The witty dialogue and strong character connections are inspiring, urging writers to strive for similar quality in their own work.
“The Bear” evokes a sense of classic TV, where a specialist protagonist faces overwhelming challenges and triumphs, akin to a superhero. This pilot episode is exhilarating and leaves the audience eager for more, despite the clear indication of Carmy’s underlying struggles.
Additionally, the script’s vivid descriptions of food might leave readers hungry, a testament to its immersive quality. Writing a script that makes such a strong sensory impact is a noteworthy achievement.
If you read the script and disagree, I’d love to know what you think didn’t work. Specifically for this first episode – I can’t hold an opinion on future episodes and seasons as I’ve not watched/read them.
I don’t think I personally need to commend the script further, and I have little disagree on that has already been said about this show. I found reading the script a wonderful experience and urge you to do the same.